I’d always wanted to be a dad, since as long as I can remember. My wife had always wanted to be a mother. There was never a question about whether we would have them, the question really was when. My wife (even before we were married) had always put it off to a certain extent, setting a future milestone. 30th birthday, marriage, house purchase or achieving a black belt in Kickboxing. I realised early on that we both had to be on the same page as to when we tried for a baby so I avoided pushing too hard. Or at least I thought I did.
We bought our house last year and had it renevated, then we got married and then finally had long break in Thailand. Looking back I’m so glad we we had the house in place without it being a building site before we tried to conceive or actually had a baby. It’s a stressful time and knowing what I know now, do all you can you remove potential stressful times before having a baby.
Again, with the wedding ceremony, I’m glad we did it before the baby. I know its traditional to be married before children, but in this day and age, fewer people are wanting to spend a fortune on getting married, so for us, one was not necessarily before the other. However the stress levels associated with arranging the big day can be over whelming. It’s the last thing you need if your pregnant or at least trying to get pregnant. Like I mentioned earlier, get potential milestones or stressful milestones over and done with. I’m certainly glad we did.
Our last big milestone was travelling. I’m 32 and my wife 29. Neither of us has had time to travel or the finances available to do it but it’s something we had always wanted to do. It seemed only logical to at least try for a short break in Asia before allowed the tiny patter of footsteps to consume our lives.
Thailand happened shortly after our wedding, a honeymoon of sorts. We had decided (or my wife had decided in reality) that she would cease to take her contraception shortly before we left with our backpacks in hand…
In preparation for pending motherhood, my wife went to speak to the mid wife at the doctors. She came back with the warning it could take a long time to become pregnant and that I should be prepared for some hormonal changes due to the lack of contraception. I’ll be honest, I wasn’t looking forward to heavy period and associated PMT, potential weight gain and affected sex drive that I had so fondly read about on the net. The internet unsurprisingly has an abundance of sites that help understand what to expect from a woman who has been on contraception for over 10 years if you have questions or worries.
The other thing my wife came back with from her visit from the mid wife was a handful of Vitamin D and Folic Acid. You can get the all in one supplements but we ended up with the individual pills from Boots and Holland and Barrett:
Please comment below if you want a comprehensive list.
With our supplements in hand we began preparing for the long road ahead. In my mind I wondered how long it will take. Would we have problems? Would I personally have the right sperm count? Should I have my sperm count checked? What if we need IVF? Do we need to know her ovulating pattern?
As it was early in the process, we avoided any ovulating sticks or patterns of when to try. We just went out about things in the normal way. Every time we had sex, I was convinced we made a baby. I think I even bought some pregnancy tests to use in the first week of trying. I know! A bit too keen?!!!